Sorry Rico

so at the beginning of the school year i fell head over heels for this guy Rico. He was funny, easy to be around, didn't drink, or smoke. He was the first guy I ever completely lost my head over. He told me one night that he liked me and I was so over joyed that I couldn't fall asleep that night; reality was just so much better than my dreams then. In short he was too scared to get into a relationship, no matter how much he wanted one, and I didn't deserve to feel as if I wasn't good enough to be in one with him.

   After I broke things off with him it became obvious that friends wasn't something we were gonna do. So as hard as it was I eventually (after a rebound relationship, I trip to Cozad, and a lot of walks) got over it. Rico it turns out wasn't who I thought he was. He drank when we were "sort of together" smoked and who knows what else.

     Well I have began to really like someone else, but the other night after a dance Rico began to talk to me again. I'm not stupid; i know I wasn't going to fall for him, but I missed him as a friend. 

   Even so there was a sliver in the back of my mind that worried I would fall again. Luckily, yet sadly something occurred that would reassure me it wouldn't happen again.

  Well the other night Rico and a few other people I know well went drinking at a friend's grandma's house. Rico got drunk and screwed a random chick. Turns out he chipped in her V-card without realizing it.

  At first I was grinning at the news because after the lies he told me and the pain I endured I thought a cosmic "Ha-ha" had slapped him in the face. My face literally had a grin on it the entire day. 

   Then I realized that the Rico I know probably feels terrible. And I shouldn't relish in someone else's pain; especially when there is a chick out there that settled for a one night fling to be something as special as her first time.

     Luckily this has shown me that i'll never care for him how i once did, and that i'll only be a great "what if" in his life if i'm anything at all.